Understanding the Selfish Persona

When you consider the qualities you value most in those close to you, kindness, goodwill, generosity, and altruism likely come to mind. But what about when you think about the flaws that irritate you the most? Due to its impactful nature, selfishness often tops the list as the most bothersome fault.

Selfish individuals might grab the biggest slice of cake without considering those who follow, displaying their trait overtly. However, their behavior can also manifest in subtler, yet equally frustrating ways.

Distinguishing Between Selfish and Egocentric

Selfish and egocentric individuals may exhibit similar tendencies, and one doesn’t necessarily exclude the other. It’s entirely possible to be both selfish and egocentric. “However, there are slight but significant differences between the two,” clarifies Saya Des Marais, a therapist for PsychCentral.

While selfish people often intentionally behave in ways that harm others to benefit themselves, egocentric individuals might be so engrossed in their own thoughts that they overlook the impact of their actions on others. “Egocentric people may feel more remorse when they realize they’ve hurt someone,” she adds.

Understanding the Selfish Persona

Fear not, having acted selfishly doesn’t permanently categorize you among the selfish ones in your circle. We all act selfishly at times. It’s crucial to remember that putting oneself first occasionally is also vital for self-care, especially psychologically. “Most humans fall somewhere along the spectrum between pathological selfishness and extreme altruism,” points out Saya Des Marais.

You might act in your own interest at times, yet also show prosocial or altruistic behaviors at other moments. The roots of selfishness vary. They may stem from family upbringing or the culture of the community one grew up in. It could also be genetic or a symptom of a personality disorder.

To better understand how selfish people operate, Diane Barth, a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst, outlines their personality in two key traits for Psychology Today:

• Excessively or exclusively preoccupied with oneself.
• Disregarding the needs or feelings of others.

Self-focused tendencies lead selfish individuals to perceive others’ successes as a loss to themselves, observes Stefan Falk, a workplace psychology researcher for CNBC. “Since she struggles to see the value in supporting those around her, she views others’ victories as unfair and a result of favoritism,” he explains.

This mindset also explains why selfish people struggle to share and give unless there’s something in it for them. Lastly, selfish individuals tend to ignore or deny others’ emotions, leading to manipulation tendencies to invalidate someone’s feelings or guilt-trip them, notes psychologist Timothy J. Legg for HackSpirit.

**Le Profil Type d’une Personnalité Égoïste**

This article first appeared on psychologies.com – Author: Louise Leboyer